Yes, yesterday was may birthday. And to those of you who know...yes, I am ___ years old. To those who don't...wag nyo nang alamin...anyway, I don't look it naman (yes, what confidence!!!).

As a sign of leaving the old year behind, I cut my hair short. Sabi nila para matanggal daw ang malas (wish ko lang natanggal na nga).

My birthday was uneventful. We just went to mass and that's it...we didn't even go out to celebrate my birthday. No... we did go out...to SM bicutan (again) just to check on my e-mail and return some vcd's but that was it. Ang lungkot di po ba? But despite it being uneventful...it was, in a way, insightful (may word ba na ganon)? Basta yun. After all these years it looked like nothing changed. I mean, I feel the same way I used to feel 10 years ago. I didn't think I matured enough. I don't think I have accomplished enough. But then again, when I think of all those years that I have been through...it brought me to thinking that yes I did mature, in a way. And I did achieve something...in a way. The relationship that I went into wasn't easy...but I survived...we survived. If I remember right, I told my friend when the relationship just started that this will only be for 2 weeks because at that time I feel that these kinds of relationship really don't last...well, I was wrong. We've had times where we had to be apart but I guess that was what made us stronger. I'm not proud of how the relationship started but I'm proud of how it lasted. To those who know my story, I don't recommend this nor do i disagree to it...it's just that it's a hard situation to be in. I guess maturity came in when I decided that I want this person to be in my life and by doing that I would have to "suffer the consequences" and fight for what I want. Actually, I'm not really sure if that was maturity or just being plain stubborn. I was looking for an achievement. To some, it may mean a higher paying job, having your own house and car before you reach the age of thirty, going abroad and making it. Just last night, i realized that I want these things too...but what I want most is the family that I have right now. This is my achievement...a relationship that for me lasted more than it should, a daughter who from the very start didn't give us any headaches even when she was a baby...a happy person if I must say...a loving and happy family. All these years, I could count the times when I was given a gift by this person...when I last counted, around 3...including Christmas presents. But surprisingly, I never complained about it. We joked about it, yes...but it never was an issue between us. I guess having him and Angela is a gift in itself that I never looked for anything more...all the gifts we could have bought each other, we bought for Angela instead. His gift to me...someone I could talk to and tell all my fears and dreams to, a person who understands how I am and who I am and why I am the crazy person that I am, a person who sticks with you through thick and thin and a person who loves his family with a passion. This is the gift that I want...and I have it.

Now, if we could just have a house and a car and 1 million in the bank...that would be nice as well